An open poem on behalf of moms and dads who wait…

After a long week filled with long conversations with foster-to-adopt moms and dads who are longing for adoption day, I wrote this. It’s a window into the bedtime routine of a parent who waits.

While You Are Sleeping

While you are sleeping
Steady breaths fill the air
I stop and pause and wait a moment
So thankful you are there.

While you are sleeping
Cheeks blanketed by light
I gaze at you and smile at you
So blessed you’re in my sight.

While you are sleeping
I can’t believe this gift
I kiss your face, I breathe you in
My joy you sure do lift.

While you are sleeping
This aching strikes my heart
How could this love I feel so deep
Be ever pulled apart?

While you are sleeping
My breath begins to shake
I find myself on my knees
Crying desperate for your sake.

While you are sleeping
My prayers begin to burst
Oh God, my God, draw near to me now
It’s for this child I thirst.

While you are sleeping
My strength is broken down
Everything I’ve held together
Now pieces on the ground.

While you are sleeping
My fear it starts to win
Because it’s true, I’m terrified
Of the day you won’t be in.

While you are sleeping
I imagine you aren’t there
Empty arms, empty heart
No longer in my care.

While you are sleeping
I wonder why this way
Why this tender mama’s heart
Has to wait and long and pray.

While you are sleeping
I ask for Jesus to take my hand
Guide me through these burdened waters
Please strengthen me to stand.

While you are sleeping
I am choosing to believe
That every blessing that comes from Heaven
We one day will receive.

And in the morning when you wake
I will shelter you in grace
I will give to you all I have
In this home you have a place.

We’ll laugh together and cry together
And all will be just fine
Nothing is allowed to harm you
Because right now, you’re mine.

So as I kiss you one last time
Resting head to head
I say goodnight and thank my God
It was to you that I was led.

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